I’ve never been much on New Year’s resolutions: made with good intentions but often soon forgotten. But it seems right to hold good thoughts as we enter another year. I’ve borrowed this from Amber Lydic’s The Art of Equine Alchemy.
“Close your eyes
and image yourself
in a relationship…
Within this relationship you have no voice.
Maybe it’s your first one, or maybe the 10th one…
You meet and immediately you are told where you will live, where you will work, how you will exercise and who you will be friends with… if anyone.
When you try and express that you are fearful of the uncertainty, confused about the new life, and worried no one will ever hear you again… you are met with more directions… over and over… with no time to process or time to be still and be heard…
Imagine living day after day… walking on eggshells, not knowing what our partner will be like that day… often they use you as a means to feel better, dumping all the stress from their job and life on you… projecting all their insecurities and short comings right into you… blaming you for not being a better listener… even saying you are a jerk, stubborn, and even calling you stupid…
How do you cope with this? Do you shut down and stop trying?… do you try and run away, are you frozen in fear and anxiety, so much so that you are triggered by what seems to be “nothing”…and “out of nowhere”?
None of this is anywhere near a healthy partnership,
yet it’s where we expect our horses to live everyday…
These animals are gifts, accountability partners, and their behaviors and desperate attempts to communicate are a clear mirror to what is happening for us internally… they do not judge, they forgive constantly and love unconditionally… and when they don’t they are labeled as “problem.”
It’s time to take responsibility for our side of the relationship… they have no choice in this game, the least we can do is practice a little patience and empathy… manage our own emotions so they don’t have to navigate that energy… .
It’s my belief that they are here to support us in our growth, hold us accountable and teach us the virtues we came here to embody…
It’s time to get present with them…
it’s time to stop taking their offerings for granted
With Love and grace”
Amber Lydic Photo by Annie Spratt